Posted by: zebbook | April 18, 2012

THE BOOK OF 3RD KINGS (II and III)

CHAPTER TWO

“All scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness” 2 Timothy 3:16 (NIV)

This is NOT a scripture, and it seeks to perform none of the functions of a scripture, the author has made no effort whatsoever to this end. It is just a script, maybe, made up of imagina-REAL characters.

 

1. Now it was that long before the time of king Jona, son of Bele, on the throne that officers of the Guards Force ruled as kings in the land, and the people had no control over them.

2. And it was that these kings wrought great evil in the sight of the Lord. In their time, all manners of crimes and corruptions prevailed in the land, and there was no peace whatsoever for the people.

3. So nobody could talk ill of the kings, no such freedom was accorded even the news makers, for whosoever shall displease the king in speech shall surely be put to death.

4. Then it was that all the brave men in the land were gone on exile, for they could not keep silent in the face of tyranny, lest the man dies in them, and the rest of them that would not go away, such were cast into the prison.

5. The people therefore were laden with fear, and suffering covered the land, and gross suffering the people.

6. So they murmured aloud and brought their complains before their rulers saying “This burden that thou hast put on us is too heavy for us to bear, there is no peace in this land, and we suffer hunger, even unto the point of death. Care ye not, o kings that we all perish?”

7. To which the kings would reply and say “You people know not how to lead. See, we shall appoint unto you rulers in every community, from amongst you, and they shall attend to your needs”.

8. But things continued to be as of old, and the land continued to suffer greatly, but the people kept smiling, even as they continue to suffer.

9. Now Zani, son of Ibacha, a General of the Guards Force, was two score and ten years old when he became king. And he did that which was evil in the sight of the Lord, and continued in the wicked ways of his fathers.

10. So the people murmured against him, and he said to himself “The people grumble because I am a General of the Guards Force, and they think I am of them not. Therefore, let me remove this uniform from my neck and I shall become just like them. Then shall I reign forever in the land, even as my friend Badahfi as done in Nibya”

11. But behold as he lay down in the midst of his many women that he said “Bring me apple that I may eat” and he knew not that that apple was bad, so he ate and he died.

12. And when the people heard that the king had died, that they shouted with joy and rejoiced greatly saying “Behold, the enemy of the land and of the people is dead. O Lord, Thou hath worthy of praise, Thou that smote mighty kings, for thine mercies endureth forever. Thou have heard our cries, which we cried unto thee, now surely we shall be free”.

13. But the Guards Force acted quickly and even while the people yet rejoiced over the death of King Zani, that they took another General from out of them, Abusolim, son of Ibubaka, from the North, to reign in his stead.

14. So when Abusolim became king, certain advisers came unto him and said “O Great king, indeed God has favoured thee to be king, for it was not by thine own doing. Remember now therefore your predecessors and the wickedness which they wrought in the land and how their names are remembered not for good.

15. Think ye therefore and do good to these people, and thy name shall forever be honoured in the land, even unto thy generations yet unborn”.

16. So the king hearkened unto the voice of his advisers and he opened the prisons, and set free all those that the former kings had held captive, even those that were to be put to death, all save a certain rich man from the West, who had once declared himself king.

17. But of him it was said that when he was thirsty that they gave him tea, and the man died. So the people of the West, and of the kingdom of Igun, mourned his death, for they liked him greatly.

18. Then said they unto themselves, the twelfth day of the sixth month of every year shall be a remembrance for him, and there shall be no work on that day, and so it is, even to this very day.

19. Now when the people saw that the new king was more benevolent than his fathers they choose representatives from amongst them and said “Go up unto the king for us and say to him that we demand to elect kings for ourselves to rule over us.

20. Now let us elect for ourselves therefore, a king out of us, for us and by us. And if thou shall do this, then shall we forever remember you for good in this land”.

21. So the representatives went up unto the king and said unto him even as the people have commanded them.

22. Then the king replied them saying” I have heard all that the people have said, and I shall do according to all that they have demanded, let them chose from amongst them, a man in whose abilities they trust, and he shall be made king.

23. Only let him be from the West of the land, for we owe them a king after the death of their brother, the rich man.

24. And when the people heard, they were very happy and choose from amongst them two men, Holu, the son of Fala, and Olumegun, the son of Sanjo. Now Olumegun was one of the prisoners which King Abusolam had set free and he was from the clan of the dead rich man.

25. And the people of the North said, he is our friend and will do good unto us, and members of the Guards Force said, surely he is one of us, so they favoured him to be king and Olumegun was elected king over the land.

26. And so it was that on the twentyninth day of the fifth month in the year before the second millennium that Olumegun assumed the throne of his forefathers and the people hailed him saying “He is surely another Joseph, for he has come from prison to become king”.

27. Now the rest of the acts of the Guards that, and all that they did, and the sins that they sinned, are they not written in the books of the chronicles of the kings of the land?

 

“Who does not know that kings and rulers sprang from men who were ignorant of God, who assumed because of blind greed and intolerable presumption to make themselves masters of other men, their equals, by means of pride, violence, bad faith, murder, and almost every other kind of crime? Surely the devil drove them on”

Pope Gregory VII

 

 

 

CHAPTER THREE

 “They say that kings are made in the image of God. If that is what He looks like, I feel sorry for God” Frederick The Great (Frederick II)

 

1.       Now Olumegun was three score and two years when he became king, and he reigned in the land for eight years, and did that which was good, and that which was evil, in the sight of the Lord and of the people.

2.       And it was that the day after his coronation, he said unto the officers of the Guards Force that had reigned over the people “Take off from your necks now therefore your uniforms, and go every man to his house and retire to the bosom of thy woman for the land needed not thy service any longer”.

3.       For he feared that they would gang up against him and wrench power from his hands as is their manner.

4.       But the officers were happy not and said one to another “See how he has turned against us, after all that we did to see him crowned king, surely he is an ingrate, come now and let us see to it that he succeeds not”, and they gathered and plotted evil against him but their counsel came to nought.

5.       Now in those days, the House of seniors was a House of Riot and the House of People was a House of Chaos, and they would fight and throw chairs at one another and would say to their leaders “We know thou has collected big bags of gold from the king, but you give us not our share, now we shall remove you, and put another in your stead”,

6.       So they would do according as they have said, and choose a new leader for themselves, and they would do unto their leader even according as they had done unto the former one.

7.       In those days, the Loudspeaker of the House of People was Sirlusu, son of Buharee, who had said unto the people “I am a very wise and knowledgeable man, and I have gone to the land of the white people to acquire knowledge, even to the land of Thoronto, see, here is the paper that they gave me”

8.       He said these things that they may make him their leader, for majority of the people in the House were unlearned.

9.       But certain wise men in the land inquired into the matter, for they observed that Sirlisu appeareth not learned, both in act and in speech.

10.     Behold, the white men of Thoronto said unto them “We know not of the man who ye ask, and he came here not to acquire knowledge”

11.      So when Sirlisu, son of Buharee, saw that his lie was found out, he went before the House of People and said “Forgive me brethren, for I knew not what I was doing” and he cried before them.

12.     So they had compassion on him, and cast him not into prison, even as they would have done to a commoner, according to the law of the land. 

13.     In those days, many were the afflictions of the king with the Assembly of People, but the power of money delivered him from them all.

14.     And it was, that the king would stay not in the land, but he would travel to other lands afar off and would dine with their kings and queens but he said to the people “See thou how I toil day and night, and go from kingdom to kingdom to bring foreign money into our land, that we may spend and be rich”.

15.     But the people wondered, saying “Has God not blessed our land with gold, and does honey not flow from but of the earth for us, why need we then to spend local money to get foreign money?” but he hearkened not unto them, for he was a man very strong in his decisions.

16.     Then one day king Olumegun said unto the people, “The palace has many enterprises, but they bring forth not profit into the royal purse, I will sell them now therefore to the rich men in the land, that we may collect the money and do good to the people”

17.     But the people were not happy, for the king would sell off the legacies of the land into the hands of those that were become rich by stealing from the land, and said unto themselves “The king shall surely say to himself one day, the people of my land are too many, and they bring forth not profit, let me sell them off now as slaves to other lands”.

18.     And after all these things, that kings from other lands came to see how the king fared with his people, and he would show his guests around his palace and the beautiful streets of the city of Habuja, where his palace is,

19.     And he would say to them “Examine thou the works of my hands, this is the same in the whole of the land, but you need not go farther than this place, lest you become weary from too much traveling”

20.     He said this because he feared they would not approve of him if they saw the state of the rest of the land.

21.     Now when his reign as king was to come to an end, king Olumegun said to himself “Shall I now go back to the kingdom of lgun and become an ordinary farmer again? Surely I cannot till the ground again at my old age.

22.     For this cause shall I arise and go to the House of Seniors, that they may allow me to reign for yet another four years, and if they agree, I shall yet extend my reign after the four years, till none in the land shall be able to challenge me, and I shall die on the throne and my sons shall reign after me”.

23.     But when the people heard of the kings plan, they revolted against him and said “Go away, old man, for we shall have none of you again, you have done us no good these eight years that you have been king”

24.     And the king was not happy, for the people rejected his plans.

25.     Now the kings deputy was a certain man from the North, Itiku, son of Habubaka, who said “Behold, for eight years have I been a deputy, but I have been only a little better than a commoner in the kingdom, now I shall exalt my throne above that of the king, and when he is gone back to his farm, I will reign in his stead as king”

26.     So he began to gather men unto himself for this same purpose, but when the king heard of these things, he called him into his chambers and said “Come and let us reason together, I know the thoughts of thine heart, even to ascend unto the throne after me, surely as I live, thou shall not be a king in this land, for I know the works of thine hands, that thou art nothing but a thief.

27.     And you seek not to be king for the sake of the people, but that thou shouldest fill thy purse with gold, pressed down, shaken together and running over, even till thou has no place again to contain it. Look at me now therefore for I shall stand against thee with all the powers that I have”.

28.     So Hatiku went away from the kings’ presence angry and dejected, but he still would not change his mind. And he went and joined forces with the kings’ enemies and said “He is thine enemy, and my enemy, together we shall see to his end”.

29.     Now the Queen was a woman of great beauty and of a kind heart and she was loved greatly by all in the land for she was generous and loves children.

30.     But when she was become old, she said to herself “Age taketh away my beauty, and I am no more beautiful to behold for I have become fat. I shall go now to the land of white men, and there shall I be born anew”.

31.     But while she was in a foreign land that her spirit was taken from the very body that she cared after. And when the king heard that his queen has died, that he became exceedingly sorrowful.

32.     The king wept.

33.     And the people said “See how he loves her” and the whole land was thrown into mourning.

33.     So when his reign was come to an end, the king choosed Imaru, the son of Musir, from the North, and anointed him as king and his deputy was Jona, the son of Bele, from the clan of oil.

34.     Now the rest of the acts of Olumegun, son of Sanjo, and all that he did, are they not written in the book of the chronicles of the kings of Nigeria?”

I was much an enemy to monarchies before I came to Europe. I am ten thousand times more so, since I have seen what they are. There is scarcely an evil known in these countries, which may not be traced to their king, as its source, nor a good, which is not derived from the small fibres of republicanism existing among them.

THOMAS JEFFERSON, letter to General Washington, May 2, 1788

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Responses

  1. Damn! Now this is sheer genius, a juxtaposition of the Holy book with true-to-life occurences on our land. I’m in awe zebbook. Can’t wait to see more books such as this, and with envy in a corner of my heart I wish I was the one who wrote this. A great one as always.

  2. Wow! Simply beautiful! Such undeniable correlation and vivid description of the present day Nigeria ~ using the KJV concept. The happenings here have long ago been recorded in history (in a different way) with maybe slightly different characters but here they are happening again..Its only a pity our leaders can’t read in-between the lines. I believe the chapters are still being written though and its our prayer it doesn’t all end in a tragedy as with the Israel of old; Nigeria will not go into captivity!
    Thumbs up to the author.

    P.S Nice disclaimer too

  3. All i can say is that your style is intense.. just like Dan Brown’s Da Vinci’s Code…

  4. THUMBS UP!


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